Now that all of the background information is out of the way, we can get to the heart of the matter; the effects of all of this. I have had trust issues. I have flinched when I see any inclination of a man being abusive in any way of a woman or children. This is why the issue of Human Trafficking breaks my heart, and moves me, as it does, because it is abuse of women and girls. Women were not made for abuse.
I was angry and hurt by my "Daddy Issues." I went to counseling to deal with it and get past it. I have had issues with people who try to manipulate myself or other people that are close to me. I have not had the best of relationships with men. My weight has gone up and down. In short, I have had “Daddy Issues.”
What are “Daddy Issues” you ask? They are the results of trauma, hurt, and disappointment that stretches into your present life. Now, we can live as best as we know how with such issues, or we can overcome them. It’s the difference between victory and victimization. You see, I was a victim once, when I could not do anything about it, but now I have the power of choice, as to whether I continue to be the victim, or break free from the cycle.
My dad came from a cycle of abuse, where he just continued the cycle, instead of making a conscious choice to break it. I have the same power. I can choose to be a victim and wallow in the pain of my past, using it as excuses for failures and shortcomings in my life, or I can put a period and move on. I choose to move on.
Life is not perfect. Very few kids grew up in loving and nurturing homes, had the love and protection of their father, or a sweet relationship with him. The reality is there is a whole generation out there that does not even know their father.
It’s quite sad, this reality. Good men are hard to find, but I am confident they are out there. Society is out of control because of "Daddy Issues." Angry, hurt kids become angry and hurt adults, who hurt other people, because they themselves are hurting so bad. That is, unless they choose to stop being the victim and break the cycle of abuse. It is easier said than done, by the way.
I want to encourage you right now. You are reading this and no doubt you can relate. You have your own "Daddy Issues." You've wondered what's wrong with you. What could you have done differently to make it all better? Stop! There is nothing wrong with you and there is nothing else different that you could have done to change matters. You were a child. Your dad should have known better and done better, but in all honesty, he did the best that he knew how to do. Remember, he was a kid once who had "Daddy Issues." He too was hurt, very deeply, so deep that he never could see a way to break free from the cycle. But you are different. You are going to break free today!
See, it all begins with the F word. No, not that one. This one...forgiveness. Now, before you get all upset and say, but you don't know what he did. He did ... Stop! Forgiveness is for you dear one. Forgiveness is you releasing the death grip that you have on the butcher knife in your hand, so that someone can remove the knife from your hand, without you being further wounded. Forgiveness releases YOU! It breaks the chains, weights, and shackles that you have been dragging around all these years. Do you want freedom? Do you want to be free? Do you want to break the cycle, so that you can have a loving family of your own that you pour your love into? Then, forgive your dad.
It's been how long? How many years have you been angry? How many failed relationships have you been in and out of? How many negative behaviors have you developed to cope? Aren't you tired of all of that? Then, let it go. Do it today. Forgive your dad. Release him. Declare that he owes you nothing and put a period and move on. You owe it to yourself, your spouse (or future spouse) and your children (or future children). The cycle breaks with you - with your conscious decision to be free and to live free. It also breaks with your choice to love yourself and then love others, as you love yourself.
Will it all be sunshine and rainbows? No, but you will be at peace within. Don't you want peace for your heart and soul? Do you want peace in your marriage (or future marriage)? The choice is yours. You stand at a great precipice. The power of choice is in your hands. I am praying for you. You are more than a conqueror. You are an overcomer.
Let this song, Overcomer, by Mandisa encourage you right now to release your "Daddy Issues" today through the power of forgiveness.
http://youtu.be/z29olPjFbqg
Continued...
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